The last 5 days truely had an effect on my yesterday, luckily I called in to my last shift or else I would have totally lost it.  Ms. Westemeier picked up that something was wrong but it took my lady to actually pinpoint the problem.  I thought things I shouldn’t have yesterday and voiced it.  Alcohol of course came up and I inquired the reasons for its use.  I had a jello shot, a very strong jello shot and as with all alcohol i consume, regreted it.  Not the fact that I did something that I wanted to do, but that it had to involve alcohol.  Everybody had fun though so I just made sure to stay out of the way and not ruin anybody’s fun.  I got a glimpse into a future hopeful job.  The jury is still out on that one.  Jarvis finally popped the big question to his lady on thanksgiving, damn that was a hard secret to keep.  Last night I got a random call from an old good friend.  I witnessed yet another great relationship go down the tubes.  My lady asked me a question that I heart screams yes to but my head must regretfully decline.  The queen of my new home is becoming more interesting and is turning into a good read.  The lady is becoming even more irresistable (if possible) and is seeping deeper in my life.  I wonder if she is really ready yet.  We got a little snow yesterday, I think.  I could’ve been seeing shit for all I know, this lack of sleep is really getting to me.  I will rest up good tonight for Aden.  I miss my baby boy too much.  I’ve realized that I’ve been doing everything to keep myself busy to not think about him not being around.  I hope I don’t freak him out when I get him tomorrow.  Well I at least I’ve moved from 4 to too many to count.  Jarvis and the new lady seem to get along, both of them are cocky as hell so it shouldn’t surprise me.  I lost alot of hair yesterday and its feeling a little chilly.  Hmmmmmm chilly would taste really good right now.  I really want some Lula’s Cafe, hopefully Danie wants to go after I get off work.  That tea is the shit.